Archive for October, 2019
Of Rebels, Bears, Landsharks, Shrimp boils, and Beatdowns
Happy Homecoming, Tiger fans!
For the happiest time of the happiest time of the year, climate change has blessed us with an early beautiful fall day in the forecast for this Saturday. Sunny, high of 60, a perfect day for tailgating. (editor’s note: it may be windy, bring a coat). Football has blessed us with more football! Our beloved, undefeated* Tigers host Ole Miss, with kickoff scheduled for 6:00 p.m. (Seriously, you might bring a coat.)
Mike Messer is doing a shrimp boil for the tailgate. Potatoes, corn on the cob, shrimp, etc. It’s our first-ever** tailgate shrimp boil. I’d imagine we’ll start eating around 4:00, with a batch or two ready before and after that. I’ll be at the tailgate well before that, you should be also. Desserts and snacks until shrimp boil is ready would be good bringing options. Call Mike Messer at Shelter Insurance for all your insurance needs.
Ole Miss is commonly known as the Rebels. For a long time, their mascot was a caricature of a Southern Civil War colonel. They finally figured out that wasn’t a great idea anymore, so changed to a Bear for a while. The bear’s name was Rebel and it’s described on the internet as an “anthropomorphic black bear.” Sounds catchy.
The folks at Ole Miss didn’t take to that either, So they changed it to what the internet describes as an “anthropomorphic shark”. He goes by the name of Tony. Tony the Landshark. There’s some real actual history regarding a guy named Tony who played football that started the landshark thing. That history dates all the way back to… … …2008.
It’s like if Mizzou changed their mascot to Pig and team colors to Brown. I presume in 2021 Ole Miss will change their mascot to either something called a Tunsil — which will be a football player smoking a bong in a gas mask, a VSCO girl, or whatever the current TikTok craze is.
Go Tigers, beat the Ole Miss caricatures of a football program. 41-17 seems right to me. Speaking of caricatures, screw ku.
*games in August don’t count
**tailgates on a dock for games in August don’t count. Similarly, neighbor’s tailgates that also did a shrimp boil don’t count.
Beat the Troys
Happy October, Tiger fans,
On Saturday, our beloved Tigers continue their undefeated season by beating the Troy, um, Troys? by a score of approximately 42 to around 12 or so. Kickoff is scheduled for 3:00 pm, tailgate will be happening as usual. I think we’ll likely have some chili dogs and fixings, in limited quantities, bring what you will.
All I know about Troy is that they supposedly have a good offense, they beat us one time by surprise when we accidentally scheduled them at their place, and every time we play them I make Troy-was-a-bad-Brad-Pitt-move-and-he-dropped-out-of-college jokes.
Go Tigers, beat the Troys, see you at the tailgate. Speaking of beating things, screw ku.