Jason's Untimely Thoughts

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Bye Bye Beaker

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Numerous times this year I’ve commented about football season being the happiest time of the year. It hasn’t exactly been true inside the stadium, but the tailgating has been grand. Friends, family, perfect weather, and numerous kiddos at the tailgate have been great. Now on to the hatred….

It all comes to a close this Saturday when our beloved Tigers take on the mythical shoe-wearing bird, woody woodpecker look-alike, wouldn’t trade Roy Williams for God, even though he’s a smarmy lying aw-shucks acting, cursing on national TV, scum who now coaches somewhere else scum, football head coach got kicked out of his son’s game for berating the official, fans will be quick to point out how much “class” they have while wearing their “Muck Fizzou” shirt, named after Civil War era vagabond redleggers from the smelly state to our west scum.

I’ve personally asked several people in the athletic department to instruct Coach Pinkel to beat KU by 100 points, so I’m confident it will be so. Either way, I plan on bringing a baseball bat to the game in case that shoe-wearing bird of a mascot comes my way. I’m scared of giant stuffed woodpeckers, or so I’ll tell the police. It’s like those tiny ears of corn you get at banquets, simply not natural.

Kickoff is at 1:00 p.m. Weather forecast currently says cloudy and cool for gametime. We’ll be out at the tailgate by 11:00 or so. It’s Senior Day at Farout Field, so go inside early and yell at a senior…., uh, give a senior the clap…. well, you get the idea.

You can’t spell “sucks” with KU.

Quote from beaker defensive end Charlton Keith, as reported on KU’s website earlier this week. “I have gained a lot of weight since I’ve been here. Coach Mangino has been patient with me, teaching me different techniques and a lot of other things.”

Rock chalk chickenhawk, screw ku.

Written by Jason Becking

November 18th, 2004 at 1:05 pm

Posted in Tailgating Fun