Jason's Untimely Thoughts

Give ’em bruises, give ’em stitches, beat them Sooner sons a bitches.

The Tigers host Oklahoma tomorrow night at 7:00 p.m., as you might have heard.  Like Ron Burgundy, it’s kind of a big deal.   It’s also Homecoming, which traditionally means I make jokes about how it always rains at Homecoming.  There’s a reason I make those jokes.

The Homecoming Parade is at Noon, I’ll go to the tailgate from there.  Food this week is provided by Todd Bennington and Bryan Ninichuck (and Natalie and Val, I bet) of Wingate Pest Control and Lawn Maintenance fame.   Call Wingate for all your pesty lawn needs.   Chili, chili dogs, frito pies, and possibly other chili dishes will be the fare.  If interested in bringing anything else, a small side dish should cover any needs.   If you’re thinking about bringing any beer, don’t.  We have lots of beer.  Seriously, we have beer.

OU is favored, more highly ranked, and so on.  But it feels a lot like 2003 vs Nebraska to me.  Night game, rain, an opponent that’s not as good as they have been, and one that Mizzou owes a beating to, both because it’s simply been long enough and something necessary to take the next step.  OU is good, though, but it seems like Mizzou is too.  Should be a fun time.

p.s. I’m a little fired up about the game.

I hosted our 20th pledge class reunion a couple of weeks ago.  By “I hosted,” I mean I sent a couple of emails, then went to CJ’s on Friday night and our tailgate on Saturday.  It was quite a stretch.  Also had my 20th high school reunion semi-recently.

I don’t know if it’s because I’m older, the circumstances, or what, but in both cases reunioning seems to be more difficult for me than before.  A lot of years and experiences have passed for both parties of every conversation at those things, and generally I don’t like the chit chat.  I’d love to actually find out more in depth what’s going on with those old friends and acquaintances, but there seems to be a lot of menial chit chat required to break through into the depths.  Menial chit chat isn’t one of my strengths, I don’t think (maybe I should avoid describing it as menial?).

I don’t mean to imply it wasn’t great seeing everyone.  It absolutely was.  Some of each group (pledge class and high school) are great great friends, people that I respect and would do anything for.  It’s almost insulting, I feel, to pretend to catch up via “how’s work?” talk.  It would simply be more enjoyable to see the group in smaller numbers where we could actually talk.  Pretty much the same reason I enjoy the postgame tailgate better than the pregame tailgate most times.  That, and basking in victory.

Luckily, menial chit chat seems to be right up facebook’s alley.  And I think it’s time to admit I’m possibly falling in love with facebook.  I like being able to keep up on the goings on with friends, follow up with strangers, and develop relationships that simply wouldn’t have happened without it.  I like looking through other people’s old photos.  Why, no idea?  Other than it’s fun.  I even like its ability to prove (to me) that people I think are jackasses, are in fact jackasses.  I assume others like that in similar fashion towards me.  Especially if they knew I was looking at all their old photos.

All the above is more true because of my limited ability to have real conversations with adults.  Just doesn’t happen much for me, still, which is understandable and largely due to time constraints (and my chit chat issues).   And, irony of it all, after weekend of reunioning where chit chat can become something I avoid, the first (only?) thing I do when getting together with a group of great friends is trivial chit chat… making fun of each other, cracking jokes, and so on.

In other hypocrisy news, I’m thinking of buying a Mac for our next computer.  It’s completely possible that’s only because I really really really think I might want an iPad, but that seems utterly ridiculous and unnecessary, but we do need a new computer, so maybe I can rationalize my way to a Mac.  stupid Macs.

The blog for the Tribune is up and going.  Posts by me and others can be found here.  Seems like I should write another one, but writing about my love of facebook and stalking you through your old photographs didn’t seem like such a good idea for the family section.

Tigers, yay.

The beloved Tigers from Mizzou host the Colorado Buffaloes on their farewell tour this Saturday, kickoff is at 6:00 p.m.  I’m hosting a 20-year fraternity pledge class reunion at the tailgate, which is clearly both good and bad news.  Good news means food will again be provided by Hoss’s Market, there around 3:00 p.m.   I’ll be at the tailgate by Noon.  Bad news, well, we won’t get into that fully, but it’s safe to assume there will be ridiculous claims, tales of freakish adventure, and mildly inappropriate nicknames, and that’s just from the Preacher in the group.

The start of Big 12 play also means the bitterness is back in full swing, as you’ll soon notice.   The message of this week’s tailgate will be “Hey, shut up with your freaking 5th down stories already.  Yeah, I remember, thanks.  And yeah, it still makes me mad.  And yeah, he still hasn’t scored.  Yes, random fan in Boulder last year asking us if we still took that seriously, yes, we do.  Shut up.  We wuz robbed.  Seriously, shut up.  Or at least take down that national championship sign, either way.  Oh hey, look, the Tigers scored again.  Shut up.”

With the 5th down nonsense, 55-0 shall be the final score.   See you there at Noon.  Or 4.

Adelaide’s birthday party weekend went well.  She had a small party with three friends (and Jack) on Friday afternoon.  Although acting cool with that idea, evidently she had some concern that a small party would also mean minimal presents.  Fortunately, she also received gifts Saturday at the tailgate and then again Sunday at the separate party for family.  In all, she made out like a bandit.  A strange bandit, probably wearing pink, that really liked American Girl, but still, a bandit.  Pictures of it all are here.

One of her gifts was an iPod touch, which through the wonders of modern technology also allows her to send/receive e-mails and text messages (and evidently making phone calls too, soon).  A big hit.  I was a little worried that it would make her a zombie, watching videos and playing games all the time, but the texting aspect thus far has been educational.  She’s been going like crazy, relatively speaking, but needs help spelling the words, etc.  It’s been all good.  The texting is free (to us) but has a crazy number, so if you happen to get a random text from area code 515, it’s probably her.  I’m not giving out her email address wildly, but you’re probably able to guess it if you try hard.

In other news, I’ll be blogging semi-regularly on the Columbia Daily Tribune website starting soon.  They’re starting a section called “Family Life” and I’ll be filling the role of single dad.  It’s a classic case of not what you know, but who you know and what they can ask you to do for free.  With the minimal guidance I’ve received (read: slightly more than none), my early expectations are for it to be strikingly similar to some of what I’d typically post here.

I’ve felt rather odd about the whole thing, since being asked to do it, to the point of pretending like I might say no.  It’s one thing to post my random spewings here, where generally only people that know me might read.  It seems different to write for an official audience of some sort.  The Columbia Daily Tribune masthead is intimidating, don’t you know.

Also, I have a strange guilty sensation.  I know people that are paid by the Tribune to write.  By and large, they’re excellent writers.   I don’t want to pretend to be them, or have my virtual reputation enhanced by associating with them.  Or more importantly, I don’t want my real reputation to cause them difficulties.  Beyond all that, knowing the state of the newspaper industry, I wonder if they shouldn’t just give those guys a raise rather than investing any resources in showing me how to post a blog on their website?

I guess I can rest easy with the knowledge that it wasn’t that big of a deal, probably took 5 minutes total to show me, they’d likely be insulted with that trivial raise anyway.  But that doesn’t mean I’m staying in the hotels they make those guys stay in on football road trips.

This Saturday the Tigers (of Missouri) take on the mighty RedHawks (formerly Redskins) from Miami (of Ohio).  Game time is at 1:00 p.m., we’ll be at the tailgate by 10:00.  Ribs from SE Missouri (of the land of cotton, old times there are not forgotten) have made the trip, if anyone is interested in bringing a side dish, am sure that will be eaten as well.

Beyond moving to 4-0 on the season, Saturday is also Adelaide (of Columbia)’s birthday.  She’ll be 8, and we’ll have birthday cake (of HyVee) and ice cream (of Central Dairy) at the tailgate for that.  This afternoon she and three friends are having a tie dye party, making shirts and whatnot.

I tried to look up some stuff about Miami (of Ohio) to make fun of, but quickly found out that I didn’t care too much.  Hey, they’re in Ohio! pretty much seems to be what you need to know.  The parenthetical will be the stuff of making fun this week.   They do have some Columbia connections.  Defensive coordinator is Carl Reese, a 1966 Mizzou grad and former Mizzou coach (1966, 1977-81).  And #64 Josh Harvey (of Hickman HS) is an offensive lineman for them.  And it’s been scientifically proven that anyone who wears #64 is a super genius funny guy.

They also make a big point of being the “Cradle of Coaches”.  Of course in that category they list their Synchronized Skating coaching connections as proof, among other things, so let’s not get carried away with those stories.

Go Tigers, happy birthday to AEB, see you at the tailgate.

Our beloved Tigers play once again this Saturday at 6:00, hosting the San Diego State University Aztecs.  We’ll be tailgating no later than 2:00 with various folks bringing various sides.  Mike & Sarah Messer are bringing the meat and the heat for the meat, buy your home through Flat Branch and insure your junk through Mike Messer Shelter Insurance.  Well, maybe your stuff isn’t junk.  Anyway.

San Diego State has a statistically outstanding offensive team, throwing for a bunch of yards, lots of passes down field, and a couple of good running backs.  Their coach is Brady Hoke, which is a miserable name.  Defensive coordinator is Rocky Long, a much better name, and formerly head coach at New Mexico.  Both have faced the Tigers previously so should be well versed in our offensive razzle dazzle.  Blah blah blah.

In a weird but fortuitous coincidence, though, “Aldon Smith” happens to be the Aztec phrase for “we will tackle your guys in the backfield and injure their spirit.”  Even stranger, “Carl Gettis” is evidently Aztec slang for “smallpox”, which wiped out their population like he will their down field passes.

With that kind of linguistic luck going for us, along with the actual small pox infested towels we’ll put in their locker room, victory is assured.  48-17 is my prediction.  See you at the tailgate in the land of the tall flagpoles.

As an aside, razzle dazzle makes me think of Stripes.  Which makes me laugh.  That’s the fact, Jack.  on a side note, screw ku.

Happy September, Tiger Fans!  Tomorrow the good guys hit Faurot Field to host the Cowboys from McNeese State.  McNeese is located in Lake Charles, Louisiana, where clearly nothing good originates  (sorry to friends from the Chuck, Sarah & I got engaged there, etc.).

As has become standard, we will be tailgating in Lot D again this year.  The first tailgate will again be catered by Hoss’s Market, food arriving by 3:30.   Food, beverage, and much of the tailgate crowd provided by Miller’s, Mpix.com for all your photo lab wants and desires.

Someone on the playground at school asked who we’re playing, “McNeazy State?”.  Of course someone at the playground was also dropping f-bombs while yelling at their kid, who evidently is named Toby Keith.  McNeese is a 1-AA school, but as our smelly neighbors to the west proved last weekend, you can’t take a 1-AA school too lightly.

The following links are provided purely for educational value, so all are reminded not to overlook a 1-AA school.  And in case you need to learn how to clap.

• College football writer, “Most depressing box score I’ve ever seen.“
• KC Star, “The Night The Wheat Stood Still“
• other team’s coach, “docile environment”, basically not very good
• go to Lawrence, learn to clap

Bedtime routine is for the kids to go to their shared room, they alternate nights picking out a movie, then both climb into Jack’s bed and watch the show.  Somewhere along the way I normally get invited to come upstairs and put covers on, take covers off, turn the fan on, turn the fan off, lay with Adelaide because Jack’s already asleep, lay with Jack because Adelaide’s already asleep, or turn the movie off because it’s over and neither is asleep.  Typically, it’s just one or two of those, sometimes it’s only the last because both are asleep.  It’s all progress, and is mostly all good.

I used to become easily annoyed at the kids’ bedtime habits, especially their unwillingness to go to bed without Sarah beside them, and her inability to say no to that every night.  While there are clearly nights when I’d prefer they’d go to sleep easier, it’s ridiculously difficult for me to imagine something less annoying than that scene now.

Tonight, “could you come lay with Jack, the movie’s over?”  Except it was still playing, Bedtime Stories, with Adam Sandler.  The credits were rolling, when I discovered that both kids knew every word to Journey’s Don’t Stop Believin’.  That’s weird, but kind of cool, I thought.  They thought it was equally weird that I knew all the words.  Anyone walking down the sidewalk outside at that moment almost certainly thought it was all weird as well.

After the song ends, I turn the DVD player off, both kids are asleep in about 30 seconds, I come back downstairs.  Decide to buy that song on itunes, thinking they might like it on road trips.  The search feature informs me they almost certainly know all the words to Don’t Stop Believin’ because of Glee.  Da da da da da da da da. Du du du du du du du du.  Da da da da da da da da.    While I know lots of people love that show, um, not nearly as cool that they know the words now.

Like many things written here, the theme also seems to apply to me, however.  Odd, I know.  Who’d think that I’d write something here that applies to me?  Shut up.

I’ve got a bit of a struggle going on personally, where I need to keep believing that it will all sort itself out.  Personal, social, professional, homal (my made up word to describe household, ending in al, to match the others)…. would just like some improvement.  I need to quit waiting on winning the lottery, especially since I don’t play the lottery, and step up and make it happen.  It’s an ongoing struggle, I’ve written about it before, but um, yeah, it’s ongoing.  Here’s to writing it again, in slightly different form, and picking up the pace once more.

on a side note, football!!!!   Tigers, 14-0.  beakers, slightly less than that.

Last year I wrote something here that I titled “July July July Sucks“, then went a month without writing anything.  This year, it seems I skipped writing a similarly sentimentally titled post, but made up for it by taking two months off from writing.

For obvious reasons, July sucks, still.  We had a great trip to Colorado surrounding the 4th of July, but there’s simply no ignoring the fact that the time period around the 4th brings back miserable memories for me.   Add in general discontentment with some things personal and professional and then the natural need to not spill all those details and thoughts in a public place, and I’m just not much in the writing spirit.  It’s too bad, really, because I’ve been plenty mad a few different times that some of it would have been quite entertaining reading, in a scorched earth sort of way.  Oh anonymous blog, when will your time come?

I don’t believe July sucked for the kids, which is good.  In addition to the time in Colorado, they spent a week in Malden where they swam, swam, and swam.  Adelaide then went to Chicago to visit the American Girl store and all other things Chicago in the early part of August.  Add in a Cardinals and Royals game each, plus spending a night at their cousins’ house, think they had a good end of summer run.  They are back in school now.  Jack has started kindergarten and is liking it very much thus far.  Probably his favorite thing at the moment is the fact that he has someone in class named Max (like our cat) and Jason (not our cat).  Just funny stuff.  Adelaide is in second grade and is glad to have two good friends in class this year.  Each start of school, though, especially with  kindergarten this year, is also painful.  It’s natural, but surprised me how much it hit me again this year.

With school comes (traffic) football, which will lift our spirits.  I’m scheduled to attend the first 7 games already, and 10 total, so I think we all know that means I’ll be going to 14 games again this year.   I’ve always really liked football, as countless relatives could no doubt attest, but I simply enjoy the escape the games provide me more now than I used to.   There’s little doubt that part of it is simply because Sarah & I never watched football games together anyway, so being there without her doesn’t seem weird.  And losses don’t bother me as much as they used to, which also seems weird.  That said, 14-0, Big 12 Championship, down with everyone.

Finally, I’m listening to my entire iTunes collection by song alphabetically.  Thus far, the clear winner for worst song in the collection is U Can’t Touch This.  Oh, Hammer.  Thus concludes the end of summer recap blog post.

As I did last year, used wonders of modern technology to ask a machine to paint a message on a road in France during a stage of the Tour de France.  Lance Armstrong’s Livestrong foundation and Nike team up to pull it off.

Below is a pic of the message, which was printed on July 19 for Stage 15 of the tour.  Here is a map of where the note was printed (according to GPS and google anyway).

SEMB Still Loved - JLB, AEB, JTB